“Conscious Uncoupling” is a feel-good phrase that went viral when Gwyneth Paltrow used it to announce the end of her 10 (ten) year marriage to Coldplay’s front man, Chris Martin.
A plethora of news articles, blogs, and social media posts quickly followed her announcement, begging the question: What is “conscious uncoupling” and is it really possible to break-up, together?
It IS possible to maintain your honor and integrity and get through divorce without the trauma so you can successfully co-parent, reduce expenses associated with unnecessary and excessive litigation or maybe even share custody of your fur babies.
Abide by a Code of Conduct
To break-up together, you must put your pride and ego aside, be willing to forgive the unforgivable, take responsibility for your part, and continue to fundamentally value and appreciate the time you spent together as a couple. You must also agree to abide by a code of conduct during the divorce process that is designed to help you break-up with integrity, fairness, honesty, and even-handedness. Create a code of conduct that is specific to the unique characteristics of your marriage and divorce, while ensuring it includes agreements to:
- do the least amount of damage to yourselves, each other, your children and the family and friends who supported your marriage;
- strive to be fair, reasonable and open-minded, remembering the goal is not to punish, but to preserve and protect existing assets;
- avoid unnecessary and costly litigation that could do irreparable damage and drain resources;
- solve your problems with professionals who can help us do so with integrity, fairness, honesty and even-handedness;
- make decisions based on an effort to do the right thing for the right reasons, thereby allowing your ethics to triumph over your emotions;
- be considerate of the needs of all involved, fair-minded and generous in ways that generate goodwill between you, and
- put the needs of your children first.
The win-win of breaking up-together is: if both parties can mutually cooperate and agree on the terms of the divorce, you can expedite the divorce with as little conflict as possible. In the end, breaking up together is better for you, your spouse, your finances, your kids, and everyone around you.
Boudreaux Hunter takes a collaborative approach to all of the divorces we handle. We put you in the driver’s seat. If you are considering a divorce, please call us or complete our contact us form to schedule a consultation with one of our attorneys so we can guide you through the next step.